Three Marriage Books You Should Buy Today.

I truly love to read. The only problem is there simply are not enough hours in the day to read all of the books that I want to. I’m always on the lookout for new books to add to my “favorites” so I can offer those to people when they ask directly about books for marriage or intimacy. Today, I’m sharing three of my favorite books about making your marriage a little more fulfilling. 

#1: From Anger to Intimacy by Gary Smalley and Ted Cunningham

There are a few reasons I love this book. First of all, this book is incredibly practical for a couple to read together. The authors don’t use clinical language, but instead tell stories about times when conflict happened in their marriage and easy-to-take action steps (or at least easy to understand) toward reducing conflict. They give a step-by-step action sequence for reducing conflict, but go beyond that to help you identify the ‘why’ that conflict occurs in your marriage.

The title might lead you to believe that this is a book that is mainly for couples with one spouse (or two) that gets angry easily, but in actuality, this book can be used even if you wouldn’t describe yourself as angry. In fact, they describe a form of anger that is less intense than most think of when they think about anger in marriage. The authors do such a great job of explaining how to do conflict well that I really believe it is a must have for any couple that has any difficulty resolving conflict.

#2: Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas

Thomas does a great job of talking about marriage being a place for God to make us a little holier. Like the authors in book choice one, Thomas does an outstanding job telling stories to make his concepts more understandable and to make this an easy but deep read. His stories come from his marriage, historical events of couples, and Biblical accounts. He teaches spiritual principles that will help you be a better spouse and will undoubtedly enhance your spiritual walk as well.

Here’s a powerful quote from Thomas that gives you an understanding of the content in his book

Getting married is agreeing to grow together, into each other, to virtually commingle our souls so that we share a unique and rare bond. When we stop doing that, we have committed fraud against our partner; we made a commitment we’re not willing to live up to.

Throughout his book he’ll give you opportunities to learn how to live up to your marriage commitment. And, as a bonus, if you get his gift edition, it includes 52 devotions that you can read together.  

#3: The Lies Couples Believe: How Living the Truth Transforms Your Marriage by Chris Thurman

I cannot brag on this book enough! I just finished reading it and this book has to be the most marked up of any book I own. In fact, if you can only get one off of this list, get this one!

Dr. Thurman talks candidly about the lies that couples believe that bring problems into the marriage.

Warning: This is not for the faint of heart!
Every single “lie” that he writes about is one that I’ve heard couples talking about. Not only that, but I saw how my early years of marriage were impacted by believing these lies myself.

The great news about this book is that not only does he point out the lies, but he gives Scripture-based evidence so you know that what he is saying is not a matter of opinion. It’s also an experiential type of book. There are places for notes so that you can begin understanding how that particular lie has impacted your marriage, and for you to write out ways that you can overcome it. But don’t worry…he definitely helps with the overcoming part as well.

He’ll guide you through Scriptures that can combat the lies so that you can see your marriage and your spouse more clearly, and he gives space for you to write notes about what you have learned. At the end of each chapter, he asks you to specifically apologize to your spouse for believing the lie written about in that chapter and then shares a prayer that you can pray over your marriage.

This would be a great read for any couple to go through together. Seriously, if you can only get one, get this book!

Question: What’s your all-time favorite marriage book and what did you love about it? Scroll down to the comments section to let me know.


Dr. Jessica McCleese is a wife, a licensed psychologist, certified sex therapist and certified sexual educator who works with Christian couples looking to improve their marriages and their sex lives using biblically-based principles. Jessica serves on the advisory board for Millennials for Marriage, is an adjunct professor at Regent University, and a licensed psychologist at her private practice in Norfolk, VA. She has a unique ability to connect with others and lead them through practical steps they can take to see improvements in their marriage and currently serves people internationally through her work at

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

9 thoughts on “Three Marriage Books You Should Buy Today.

  1. What a great concept for a post! My sister-in-law recently purchased the “For Women Only” and “For Men Only” books for my husband and I. These books talk about how the other sex thinks and I’ve gained some valuable insight already! It’s interesting how God wired us to be complementary, yet so very different!

  2. I have Sacred Marriage, and we started reading it together on a picnic date last year and haven’t read a chapter since. Need to pick that one up again. Thanks for the other two recommendations. I’ve probably seen them around, but haven’t heard too much about either book yet.

  3. These are great books… I would add His Needs Her Needs to this list… it’s a great practical book for couples, before marriage, years after getting married… it’s one to own for sure!